Goodbye Norma Jean...

Well it has been almost a year since I moved to Utah! Crazy how fast time flys. About 2 months after I moved here I started having stomach troubles. It was a little uncomfortable at first but I didn't think too much of it. Mostly I just thought at the worst I might have an ulcer, but I could just wait it out and it would pass. Plus I didn't have health insurance. Well weeks turned into months and it was getting to the point where all I could eat was fruit and rice. I then started to get these horrible attacks where my stomach would just charlie horse and I spent more times kneeling at the porcelain throne then I had in my whole life. My body was rejecting food, and I was soo sick I was having sympathy for pregnant ladies and old nursing home patients. It was getting to the point were I knew something had to be done because I just seemed to be getting sicker so I decided to make an appointment with a specialist just to see if I could somehow get to the bottom of this, I think at that point I had lost at 20lbs and although I do love losing weight I knew it was not healthy. Anyways I go to see Dr. Schmidt a Gastro something Specialist, and he listens to my story and decided he first wants to shove a scope down my throat and check out my stomach to see if it is an ulcer. I was fine with that because he was the doctor and I was really ready to find out what the heck was wrong with me. Now when I first called to set up an appointment I made sure to let them know that I didn't have insurance and they told me that was okay. Well I go in and have this scope thing done and told him I just wasn't quite sure he was going to find anything. I was right. His assistant called me that next week and told me he didn't find anything and that they couldn't help me further because I had no insurance. So back to square one except now I had a big fat bill to pay for. Thank you doctor. When did doctors care more about money then helping people? I mean I probably bought that nice fancy outfit he was wearing when we met. If I could say one thing to him it would be your welcome for the suit loser. However we all know that everything happens for a reason so there has got to be some sort of lesson learned here. So I talk with my parents and I decide to go home to see if the doctors we know personally can help me there. So I go in and have an ultra sound this time and we finally found the culprit.... gallstones! Those dirty little buggers were what I was feeling like I was giving birth to! So I was excited for the first time in months and thought they were going to take this thing out and send me on my way. Well we all know I usually don't get my way when it comes to things working out they way I plan them so when I met with the Doctor in Burley she told me that since I didn't have insurance the only way they were able to perform the surgery by law was if it was an emergency and even though I was puking my guts out every morning and not eating much. It still wasn't life threatening enough so until I was on my death bed they weren't able to do anything about it! Rejected a second time... I swear I thought I was going to lose it at that point. Another thing that was happening to me is that I was getting depressed. I cannot really describe that state of mind I was in at that point, but there is something that happens to you soul when your body is turning against you. It is not a fun place to hang out in for very long. So I pack up my things and head back to Salt Lake to wait it out. Good thing god is kind because that night I woke up around 4 am with the worst attack of my life and started to hyperventilate to the point of not being able to breathe. I had my mom on the phone freaking out and calling everyone she knew, but no one was answering. So I am laying on the floor trying to suck up some sort of air and screaming because I was going to die and my mom yells at me to call 911. So I do. They send out a fire truck and a ambulance and about 10 men come in to rescue me. At that point the attack was passing and I was able to breathe again. But I willingly went into the ambulance and had them take me to LDS hospital. Can I tell you that the ER is crawling with freaks at that time of the day. I mean I saw people that I have only seen in movies and under bridges. So I stayed in my little room and prayed they would upgrade me to another part of the hospital soon. Well as luck would have it the ER doctor was an extremely nice man who sent me away to get another ultrasound. Turns out that my gallbladder was infected and full of stones and it was not safe to let me go any longer. Thank you angel doctor! He also told me that he had no idea why they let me leave Burley when I had gone there for help. I was in way bad shape. So he scheduled an emergency surgery and I called my parents who got there just as they were about to wheel me away. Is it bad to be excited to go into surgery? Maybe so. But you are only allowed to judge me when you have been in my shoes. Apparently I am even funnier under anesthesia because when they were wheeling me to my room I am told I was naming my gallstones (Norma Jean, Lorianne, Jose,ect....) and cracking some pretty good jokes. The nurses thought I was crazy for refusing the morphine when they finally gave me a say in it, but I hate the way the stuff make me feel. I think I puked about 7 times before they let me go home and then another 4 or 5 on the way home. We did have to make one emergency stop along side the road. I had to pee pretty bad and to tell you... without being too graphic... I could have held my own in a peeing contest with a boy. Those IVs fill you full of a ton a fluid! Around that time is when the drugs wore off and I quickly learned that laughing was prohibited. I cannot tell you how much pain laughing caused me, I had to send my mom out of the room on many occasions because I would crack jokes and then we would get to laughing and I would start crying because of the pain. Looking back it was a pretty funny expirence. It is amazing how quick your body bounces back because I was snowboarding a month later. The best news of all though was that the hospital was able to get me a bit of financial aid and I made out pretty good. I have learned that it is not okay to not have insurance and pizza looks terrible the second time around. My mom was a trooper through the whole thing she would stay on the phone with me while I was crying and heard more then her fare share of my visits to the white throne. The whole expirence lasted from about October until January. I really do think giving birth will be easy after this one. haha